You were sounding fine to me today, I was so glad to know it. And you start to tell me about your new place where you help them for the next two months.
Remember I ask you to re-consider regarding the offer?You are deserved as I know you are the best person who could handle it. The facilities is a nice way of them to show you how much you are appreciated; and they are right this time. You will have a bright future life on top of its, trust me.
That choice will be another story of your life which will give you a new way of a better life and learning process. Taking the chance means that you will have to move out. That is good for you and them. Staying close by to your hometown, easy to visit your lovely sisters there so they wont miss you anymore. And for the prince and princess; I am sure they would love it to move out as they will learn something new and fresh which is good for them. And they could stay close to the big family where they belong to.
About me???Well, I don't know still why did I ask you to do that?Maybe as I want you to be stronger than usual or maybe as I want you to be happy...
The night after that conversation, I was trying to figure out the answer.I failed with the tears, sorry honey...I lie to you..I am not strong and taugh....and I am selfish...I don't want you to move out there....and I know it is impossible for me to say and keep saying it. I know the situation and I am too stupid to let you know that I am just fine which I AM NOT.
Shall I explain this to you?Better not to, as it will be ruining everything.I don't want that happened. I will keep my dream and my hope for myself. I don't want you to worry about it. I thought I will be 'just fine' without you, and if you moved out it will be 'more than just fine'..
I hope if there is a chance to see you, I want to see you in a year or two...not now...
Hi Hidden Princess,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing the article on the web. I am amazed at how fast and how close you are related to this already.
I can't deny myself from saying that its not only you having the feeling, me, this very man, is also having the same feeling. Being away is not a big thing, but I just don't want and never want this feeling of missing you taken away by the distance.
Being in East Borneo, actually meaning I am getting farther from my relatives. It takes two flights to get home, while from Jkt I only take once flight and I get home. But, in life, and some of my friends told me, that there's always choice and 'conflict'. All we need to do is to deal with it wisely and thanking God for the choice and the conflict. At least we are still given the choice, what if we are not given any? If one day you haven't seen any conflict in your life, perhaps you need to ask yourself, where's God? Its Him who provides, and He will guide.
The amazing thing about you is that you helped me to understand the ream meaning of being 'lonely' and missing someone incredibly much, yet to meet is seemed impossible.
J t'aime
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